Saying Goodbye……the ‘exes and ohs’ of a relationship

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I mean everything is great, you and your partner have been together for a year and a half. You share the same interest, feel at ease with each other, spend holidays together and even make future plans.

These are signs of a normal relationship. And then it happens…..

Break ups are rough, some amicable, but no matter what no one really likes going through them no matter which side of the fence you are on. I have been through the gamut of break up scenarios. I used to don’t wanna let go and being a Caprician does not help because I wanted to fix things or wait it out or weigh the options and so on.
Then I moved on to riding it out. So it would be like, yea I’m gonna just wait and eventually the other person will get the point that I don’t want to be there anymore or we don’t make sense together and just spare me the headache of checking out. It’s hard when that person looks at you with the puss eyes or all the love you don’t have anymore for them and you have to tell them its over (hopefully they are not psycho…but thats another blog).

At that time, I usually pray for a big flood to happen, they get washed to the other side of the earth and you send the break up note with a dove (what…. it could happen!!).Or the ever popular ‘its not you, its me’ line (by the way if that line ever worked for you let me know, maybe I’m not saying it right). Or I would subconsciously try to sabotage it by fueling arguments or hoping my partner would cheat. Ok, so this is obviously not the way to break up with somebody. Which leaves the question:

   How do you get out of the relationship?

Unless you are a heartless b—-, you would want to be let down as easy as possible. There are nice ways (if there is ever) to exit as well as bad ways. The former is kinda tricky because you don’t want to send mixed signals. But for the latter you should not be like ‘take your s— and get the f— out!”, unless warranted.

  • Try to be as honest with the person as possible
  • Don’t drag it out, delaying the inevitable only makes it worse.
  •  No we can’t be friends after, well not immediately after anyway.
  • I try to give little warning signs prior to. Like maybe having the “we need to talk moments more often” or just disinterest in intimacy.
  • I also try to think of the other person feelings when I’m considering break up. Like how would I feel if I were in their shoes. Then again I would still think I’m hot so …….
  • And most importantly, do it face to face. Don’t send an email or a card saying the last two years have been great but I can’t imagine another two with you.
So its over now and you are wondering how are you going to cope.Whether you are the breakuper or the breakupee, it’s not easy. It is said that the first five days are the worse especially if you were in one of those u-haul type relationships but it will get better – eventually.
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